I was stunned when my husband, Jake, handed me a schedule he’d designed to help me “become a better wife.” At first, I was speechless. But instead of losing my temper, I decided to play along with a plan of my own. Little did Jake know, he was about to learn a lesson that would make him rethink his entire approach to marriage.
In our relationship, I’ve always been the calm and level-headed one. Jake, on the other hand, tends to get easily swept up by whatever new hobby or life philosophy captures his interest. Whether it’s a trendy workout or the latest self-improvement video on YouTube, he’s often eager to implement the next “life-changing” idea.
Everything seemed normal in our marriage until Jake became friends with Steve. Steve is the type of guy who believes his loud opinions are always correct. You know the type—they talk over you when you try to say something, and somehow, they’re always right in their own minds.
Steve is perpetually single, which should’ve been a red flag when he started giving Jake unsolicited relationship advice. Yet, my dear husband was completely taken in by Steve’s confidence. Despite having no experience in a long-term relationship, Steve somehow convinced Jake that he had the secret formula for a successful marriage.
At first, I didn’t take it too seriously. But then Jake started dropping comments that made my eyebrows shoot up. “Steve says relationships are better when the wife takes charge of the household,” he’d say casually. Or, “Steve thinks it’s important for women to look good for their husbands, even after years of marriage.”
Each time, I’d roll my eyes and reply with a sarcastic comment, trying to brush it off. But slowly, I started noticing changes in Jake. He’d sigh when I ordered takeout after a long day at work, as if I should’ve cooked. He gave me a look when I let the laundry pile up because, you know, I have a job too. Something had shifted, and not for the better.
One evening, Jake walked through the door with a serious expression. “We need to talk,” he said, leading me to the kitchen table. He unfolded a piece of paper and slid it across the table toward me.
“I’ve been thinking,” he began, his voice unnervingly condescending. “You’re a great wife, Lisa, but there’s room for improvement.”
My heart skipped a beat as I stared at the paper. Written in bold at the top was “Lisa’s Weekly Routine for Becoming a Better Wife.”
I could hardly believe what I was seeing. Jake had actually created a schedule for me—an entire week of tasks and routines designed to “improve” my performance as a wife, based on Steve’s ridiculous advice.
According to this schedule, I was supposed to wake up at 5 a.m. every morning to make Jake a gourmet breakfast. After that, I’d hit the gym for an hour to “stay in shape.” My afternoons were filled with cleaning, laundry, and ironing, and then I was expected to cook dinner from scratch every evening. And on top of all this, I was supposed to host Jake’s friends and prepare snacks whenever they came over.
It was sexist, insulting, and completely out of touch with reality. I felt like I was living in an alternate universe. Jake was serious about this, and he had no idea how much trouble he was walking into.
Instead of reacting angrily, I did something unexpected: I smiled.
“You’re right, Jake,” I said, sweetness dripping from my voice. “I’m so lucky you made this schedule for me. I’ll start tomorrow.”
The relief on his face was almost comical. He thought I was on board. But little did he know, I had something up my sleeve.
The next morning, I sat down with my laptop and got to work. If Jake thought he could hand me a list of “improvements,” then it was time for him to see what perfection really costs.
I typed up “Jake’s Plan for Becoming the Best Husband Ever.” It was every bit as detailed as the list he had given me, except this time, the tasks were for him.
First on the list was a gym membership, complete with personal training sessions. If I had to stay in shape, so did he. I added, “$1,200 for a personal trainer.” The second item? Groceries. If he wanted gourmet meals every night, we’d need to up our budget. I typed, “$700 per month for organic, non-GMO groceries.”
But I didn’t stop there. Jake’s plan also included daily chores, meal prepping, and hosting his friends—since he thought entertaining was so important. I added a special touch: a $50,000 budget to build a man cave, where he and his friends could hang out without interrupting my perfectly structured life.
Finally, I totaled it all up and added a note at the bottom: “$75,000 per year to cover the loss of Lisa’s salary since she’ll be your full-time personal assistant, chef, and housekeeper.”
I was practically laughing out loud by the time I finished. Jake had no idea what was coming.
That evening, I printed out Jake’s plan and left it on the kitchen counter. When he got home, he saw it right away.
“What’s this?” he asked, picking up the paper.
“Oh, just a little something I put together for you,” I replied sweetly. “I figured if I’m going to improve as a wife, you might want to improve as a husband.”
Jake chuckled at first, thinking I was joking. But as he read through the list, the smile disappeared from his face. His eyes widened as he reached the $1,200 personal trainer and the $75,000 salary replacement.
“Lisa, what is this?” he asked, looking up in disbelief.
I crossed my arms, my expression calm. “Well, you want me to follow that schedule you made for me, right? This is what it’s going to cost to live up to your expectations. I can’t work and do all those things, so I figured you’d cover my salary.”
Jake blinked, staring at the paper, speechless. He had no idea how absurd his demands had been until now. The realization hit him like a ton of bricks.
Jake put the paper down and looked at me, his expression softer. “I didn’t realize how ridiculous this all sounded until now,” he admitted. “Steve made it seem so simple, but I see now it’s just… wrong.”
“Marriage isn’t about schedules or perfection,” I said quietly. “It’s about respect, partnership, and working together as equals.”
Jake nodded, his face full of regret. “I’m sorry, Lisa. I got carried away. I thought I was helping, but I see now that I wasn’t respecting you.”
We tore up both lists that night. And for the first time in weeks, I felt like we were back on the same team. The experience had been a wake-up call—not just for Jake, but for both of us.
At the end of the day, marriage isn’t about one person being “better” than the other. It’s about respect, equality, and working together as a team. Jake’s misguided attempt to “improve” me through a schedule had backfired, but it gave us a chance to have an important conversation about what truly matters in a relationship.
No one should feel like they have to meet someone else’s unrealistic expectations. Marriage is about growing together, supporting each other, and always being partners in the journey.
